Sisters’ Quarters, University House
Edgbaston Pk. Rd, Birmingham
Nov 19th 1916
My own dear Cyril
As the mail turned up last week I conclude that evidently the date of posting was by the mail leaving India on the 8th which was one of the two dates given of the mails sunk with the Arabia. If this is the case I shall not hear next week either which is very sad but nevertheless must be put up with I suppose.
I had a long letter from May yesterday which I was very pleased to get not having had a newsy letter from Badsey for some time. You will be sorry to hear that Louis Sparrow has been killed – by a shell – in France. May says his wife has been splendidly plucky about it. A memorial service was held for him last week and the Church was crowded. We shall miss seeing him in the choir. Whenever he had leave he always turned up in the choir on Sunday.
In Mother’s last letter she tells me that she has heard from a London Scottish prisoner of war that dear old Cecil was “killed” on July 1st. A letter of this man, Private Cooke, was published in the paper and the address given was a prison camp at Minden, Germany.
Mother then thought she would write to Pte. Cooke and see if he could give her any news.
His parents sent their own letter to her to read in which their son asks them to inform Mother that he received her letter and that she would hear from him giving all particulars of Cecil’s death. His words are “Lt. J.C. Brown-Constable was killed on July 1st”. This is the most definite news we have had so far and confirms the American Embassy letter saying that Cecil’s name is not on any list of prisoners.
When Mother hears direct from Private Cooke I will be able to tell you more. Poor old Mother is broken-hearted – it is impossible to console a Mother for the loss of a good son. I am proud he died in action on the field rather than as a prisoner in German hands away from his comrades. He died among friends. My brain seems numbed by these weeks of uncertainty and anxiety. I cannot realise that I shall not see my brother again on Earth. At times I feel him to be very near especially at the Holy Communion Service. This feeling of nearness had often made me think he was dead even when he was thought to be a prisoner of war.
I believe that the men who gave their lives voluntarily in this war have by their death atoned for their sins and that now they are as the Saints in the Sight of God.
It was necessary that a Man should give His Life for the Sins of the Whole World when God sent His Only Son into the World and I believe that the lives of our men now given voluntarily are for the cleansing of the World from all that defiles. You can understand how my heart aches these days. I wish you could be here to help share the sorrow which I know is yours because it is mine, I pray almost hourly in my inner consciousness that God will spare you to me but that if it is His Will that you should make the Great Sacrifice that He will give me power to bear the years of loneliness which will be left to me to live.
The Times gave an account of the preparations which have been made in your part of the world during the hot months for the coming winter campaign which gives us an idea of what to expect.
You can guess how much my thoughts have been raging round the subject and it is hard lines to be shut off from your letters at a time when one has visions of what may be happening or going to happen.
This is not a very cheering letter, darling, for you to receive out there in your loneliness – but you would rather I wrote naturally and freely than for you to read between the lines of a forced gayly worded letter. I am still in B.10. officers wards and will some day have many amusing incidents to relate which are not easy to write amusingly but need telling, in the years together which we pray are yet before us.
I am glad to say I’ve finished my visits to the dentist. He seems to think that my teeth are strong and in good condition but that I ought to go about every 3 months or so to him for inspection.
These were only small fillings this time but being front teeth they were sensitive.
We had snow yesterday and it has been a little warmer since but was bitterly cold previously.
Wilfred sent me a nice photo of himself in uniform but he is very serious in it which is a pity as his smile is one of his Chief Charms. He looks as though he was going to fight the whole Germany Army himself alone!
It is on the cards that George may get leave soon. He hasn’t had any for some time.
Mrs Horsman’s second operation has been successful and it is hoped that she may return to Kathleen by Xmas. Isn’t this excellent?
Ethel is going to Sydenham to stay with Kath and she and Jack are going to Tunbridge Wells to stay for 6 days. She is going to have six days leave soon.
Some officers seem to get a lot of leave. An ASC man here who only had a small abscess opened in his arm has had 2 months leave granted him. He has just completed 3 months leave after an operation for loose cartilage in the knee. He came back into hospital for a fortnight for this abscess and now has 2 mths further leave! And this is a man who has never been nearer to the firing line than Paris!
Still these are not the men who get quick promotion I notice. I have only got six more weeks of night duty. It will be grand to have got it over in the winter months.
I must close now, Sweetheart.
All my heart’s love, dear one – God bless you is the prayer of
Your devoted
Mela
