The Nurse’s Home
In bed
9.30 p.m.
Nov 15th 1914
My Love
Your dear patient letter received this morning made me feel very sad to think how my letter must have hurt you. I had a very short off duty time today, only from 2 to 4, because my patient is worse today and as Sunday is “visiting day” in the afternoon relatives could be with him while I was off duty. I got right into bed and rested until tea time and did nothing but re-read your letter and think.
Gradually all lost feeling seemed to return and found relief in a good cry. It sounds silly on paper but it has done me a lot of good. My heart simply ached and I longed to be with you. I lived again our last Evening hour together, in imagination, and prayed that some day God will allow us to be together for always until death parts us. It will be Cruel if we have to be parted before we are married but if God wills it I must submit. Only you can know what I shall suffer, I would much rather die myself.
Any time you do get a week-end and go down home you could count on seeing me for a couple of hours any day, and if you “phoned” me I could tell you exact time.
If we were lucky I might manage to get a ‘half day’ which is from 2.p.m. to 10.00 p.m.
When next month comes and if you let me know in good time I will try and get my day off in Xmas week if you are at home then but if this plan fails perhaps the former one will succeed.
I am making enquiries about that letter of mine which you received addressed by someone else. I went to the House Sister about it and she has reported the matter to Matron.
I posted that letter myself on Nov 3rd at 9.30 a.m. to catch 10.00 a.m. post in hospital box, just before entering Matron’s office to ask permission for leave on Sunday. After having obtained permission I scribbled a p.c. which I believe just missed that post but am not certain and to make sure of your hearing I sent another p.c. that same evening and also I was uncertain for the moment whether I had posted that first p.c. myself or given it to someone else – anyhow it was intended to catch the same post as the letter. In future if I possibly can I will post your letters in the town and I will continue to use distinctive note paper so that if things go wrong again we can trace the matter easier. The letter about which we are making enquiries was enclosed in a pinky mauve envelope to match paper.
The writing on the envelope is an attempt at an imitation of mine but whoever did it was not very clever or else they would have seen that they spelt your name correctly! I hope they enjoyed the home truths my letter contained!
It did my heart good to read that I am constantly in your thoughts. Sometimes I feel all the sentiment of our Engagement is on my side. When you wrote after my visit to Badsey you spoke more of my disappointment than your own and it made me feel hurt that you too should not be feeling very sorry too. I know, Love, you do not mean it really but sometimes you make me feel as though you expect so much from me in my letters but do not exert yourself to show me very much of you, yourself, in your letters to me. I know you are very busy and have many difficulties in your way to prevent you writing as much as you might like but the effect this had is like a cold water douche. Your letter today was charming and gave me much joy to read and seemed to draw us nearer together.
How far have you got in your Bible reading? I am now reading the Epistles to the Phillipians.
Do you remember the text you wrote in my Bible? I would not remember where it came from, and the other day I opened my Bible at random at the very text, Ep: St. John III.18.
Yes. I have been to South Tidworth Church but do not remember the aged clergyman.
I saw the death of a Capt. Batten the other day of the Kings Own Liverpool Regiment. He married a Miss Kavanagh and I knew them both in India when staying in Rajputana. I remember being very surprised at the engagement as Mr Batten, as he was then, began by intensely disliking Miss Kavanagh. She is a very pretty Irish girl. I feel so sorry for her. Her husband wrote in French in my autograph album “Time passes but friendships remains”. He and I used to be great friends.
My sprained foot occasionally gives me twinges now and again.
I must close now, darling, as it is nearly lights out time. I will post this one letter in hospital tomorrow and am marking the envelope so that you will know if you receive it without a + at the back, someone else has addressed the envelope.
God bless you and may He give us both his Grace to do our duty in the state of life to which we are at present called. I feel certain you prayed for me in Church today.
All my heart’s love – My Own.
Ever your devoted
Mela
Posted to catch 10.a.m. post in Hospital box.
