Sisters’ Quarters
University House
Edgbaston Pk Rd
B’ham
Oct 6th 1916
My dearest Cyril
In the last letter you had from me I was “specialling” three pneumonias – they are much better so tonight I am taking care of the rest of the ward.
Medical cases, 48 in number. You can guess there is “some” work! It is a ward of all sorts of cases, pneumonia, typhoid, gastric, quinsey, appendices before operation, etc. It is good experience and I am glad to have it as work of this nature is the kind one might get in one’s own house and then one could nurse them oneself. As usual my grammar, never excellent, becomes very bad on night duty. However, I daresay you’ll forgive it.
Matron will not allow me to go to a Surgical ward until my finger is absolutely well – on account of having to do septic dressing. In the ward I should otherwise have been in is the Countess of Warwick’s son. His arrival created quite a flutter! It wouldn’t worry me how great a personage he may be, I should not make a fuss of him. One man is as good as another when he is ill.
I believe Mother is in England and staying at Folkestone but I have not got her address yet. She is only over for a short time and will eventually return to Boulogne.
Fancy being on night duty until January. Do come home before then so that I can have a holiday and break the monotony!
The news from the Western Front continues to be good and the men who come home are in splendid spirits and think things are going better for the Allies than even the papers admit.
Oct 8th
I was very busy last night and unable to add to my journal but think I will have time tonight to add a few lines. Tonight and for the three or 4 nights I am in B3, officers’ ward – the nurse who is usually here was called home by telegram to nurse her mother who is dangerously ill. I’ve had rather a bad time with some of the nursing sisters since I have been put to work in the officers’ wards – not those who are working with me, they are alright. I cannot help being sent here, and swiftly under orders but I‘ve had some abominably rude remarks made “at” me in my hearing. I don’t take the slightest notice of these but still it is very disagreeable nevertheless. I shall be very glad when the war is over and I can be with you again. I am simply longing to be loved – life nowadays is so hard and joyless, just a fight for existence – with very little to brighten it. It must be far worse though for the wounded and suffering. Someone evidently has their knife into me for this is what I found written across a label on my bag which I bring over on the night duty. The label was addressed on Sept 2nd for travelling here, and after 1st Southern General I had put TFNS which means, as you know Territorial Force Nursing Service. I am what is known as a TFNS probationer – so am entitled to put this on a label. My idea was that it would make the address clearer and distinguish it from the General Hospital in the town. Someone crossed out TFNS and wrote “you are not TFNS, you are nothing but a pro of the first water”! They evidently thought that I wished to be taken for a Territorial Nursing Sister! It was a very petty trick whoever did it – and they were evidently ashamed of it as it was done anonymously so I could not strike back.
As a matter of fact none of us probationers have the slightest desire to be taken for Sisters, for whom we have very little respect. How can we respect someone who will entertain orderlies and RAMC non-commissioned officers in the dark behind screens on night duty and even sit on their knee?! Of course there are exceptions here but the majority here are of this type and we probationers get heartily sick of being snubbed by these women. We have to look after the patients when they are fooling about, and yet when it comes to the point we are supposed to be incapable of looking after the patients! You can understand how thoroughly sick all this kind of thing makes me and I suppose these Sisters think I put on airs because I prefer to behave properly in the wards – I don’t care what they think at the bottom of my heart, it only disgusts me to know that women can be so petty and mean, when there is so much good they could do if they took the opportunity instead of worrying a “mere probationer”! One’s sense of humour comes to one’s aid on these occasions otherwise one might get very upset!
Barbara is still in Paris with friends – mother is in Folkestone for a short visit to see Wilfred. She had a wretched crossing. She is staying at Hurlingham, Cheriton Rd. She did not bring Bar over on account of the expense. Friends are paying her expenses in Paris. I had a pc from her today showing the house where she is staying opposite the Louvre Museum near the Tuileries. She is having a lovely time.
I wonder when the mail will come in this week. I get awfully greedy for letters – I wonder if you got my missive in answer to an important one from you?
Oct 9th
I did not add any more to this subject last night. There was time to have done so but I was rather tired so simply rested quietly in a chair during any spare time – one’s brain feels tired on night duty. We had a convoy in too which meant a little more work. The real reason I was tired though was because after coming off duty on Sunday morning I stayed up to go to the eleven o’clock service so it was nearly 1 o’clock before I went to bed and then I did not sleep very well. It is so awfully dull to go straight to bed every day directly one comes off-duty for one is on duty 12 hours and then if one is in bed all day, one gets no change of thought and no fresh air. The padre’s sermon fitted me very well. It was about rising on our dead selves to higher things – and to live above the opinion of the world. One could almost think he knew of the insults I had received lately. All he said was so applicable.
I have not heard from Badsey for ten days so I expect to hear soon. They are very busy these days and any spare moments are naturally devoted to baby Dorothy, so there is not much time for letter writing. I see in casualty lists that Captain Worlock who wrote to us about Cecil so very nicely, saying he was a great chum of his, had been wounded – I wonder if he will be sent here – I wish he could be so that I could see him and ask him to tell me more of Cecil.
My finger is quite well again now – it soon responded to treatment.
The Sisters on night duty in here, wards B3 and B4, are very nice so it is quite pleasant to work with congenial spirits. One of them is Sister Campbell, who worked in the “theatre” when I was in there.
Although I’ve groused a bit in this letter, don’t think I am unhappy really. I am quite happy really because I don’t care what anyone says or what happens so long as I have you. All my affection and love is yours and so long as you are true to me, which I know you are and will be, the rest of the world may go. I only hope and pray that God will soon let us be together again for this separation is very trying and wearing. I am wondering what you thought of my letter which you must have received about a couple of weeks after you arroved at Basra – the one in answer to an important and confidential one from you – I do hope it accomplished its purpose – the purpose being to convey to you my innermost mind and soul, trusting you to the full. God bless you, my own dear one.
9 am
I heard from Wilfred this morning. He is gazetted to the Special Reserve 3rd Essex Regiment, stationed at Felixstowe and joins it on Thursday next. At present Mother and he are staying at the Berners Street hotel until he goes to Felixstowe. He seems quite pleased about his appointment.
I heard from your father too. He is in Folkestone for a few days. He writes quite cheerily and is happy to know you’ve had some short spell at Basra before joining your regiment. He tells me Mrs Horsman is in hospital and may have to undergo a serious operation (cancer?) on her mouth. It is very sad as she has been so happy lately. She is going to be married again, but we are afraid this operation might upset things. Judy is at Sydenham for a few days.
With much love, dear Heart, hoping to have a letter from you soon.
Ever your devoted
Mela
